One day you get up really early in the morning... like every single day, take a bath, do your hair and in my case my make up... then, get dress and finally you choose a pair of shoes.

A pretty brown old boots... I love them!

But...when you put it on, you never...NEVER in your life think, that this day you´re going to have to literally run for a life!... painful in foot and soul... then a cramp try to stop my way... fuck, but I keep running!

Oh yeap... yesterday I have to run for my mom life... is a large sad story, really make me sick try to talk about it... but I have to run maybe 10 blocks to the drugstore for a medication, is like it happend long time ago, not yesterday.

Well, but like alcoholics, we are living one day at time. Or must try to.


Maybe I have to explain... the last weeks, after "Día de muertos" things start getting really bad. (That´s why this space is a little lonely)

We get bad news from the doctor, mom is just a few steps near a dialysis, well if it was me, I´m a very clear person in this circunstances...I do what ever I have to do, to be well, for me and my daughter.

But mom is 70 now... she starts to doubt, she want to quit... is sad, frustrating, OK, I´m done!

I seriously try to do all, but now, I can´t find the right way to let her underestand her situation.

Since the doctor news... she get really sick two times... first one, she never realized what was happening, she was as if it was disconnected...almost to the point of the unconscience.

This one it was more than painful, because she was realizing everything, but her body was not answering to her thoughts. The distress is hard to describe.

OK, but now it is her choice, and I have to respect her, but in less than one week we have to return with the doctor and is necessary to take life choices.

ALL this is the SOUR side...

The SWEET side...the light of my days, my best friend, my dear Fery...last wednesday... finally the doctor take off the cast of her leg...now she is able to walk, but have to be very careful...also she have to use wheelchair to go to school.

But she can stand up... that is priceless, I´m really happy!

So, we knew Tokio Hotel is going to visit our city, yesss, last wednesday, but Fery decided she can´t be able to go to the signing, because she can´t run, or jump.

I sadly respected her choice, because I know how important is TH in her life.
That day after the doctor I take her to shool in wheelchair, and I went for her later...

Then my sister said that she can take us there... so, the two of us, can be able to help Fer.

We went to the signing place...obviously we saw them really really far away because some girls stay there since the last thursday!!!

Camping in the street, for 6 days, crazy fans!...Teen hormone screaming fan power crazy smelly girls!... jajaja I love them!

Well, Fery was so happy... people try to be careful with her. Tokio fan solidarity.

Then there was a concert in the biggest stadium in Mexico "El estadio Azteca"... where Tokio Hotel going to be part of the performers, of "Los 40 principales" (a network show), so we went there too, and get the tickets.

They left us obviously in the wheelchair area... but Fer was as happy as she were near Bill.

It was a huge performance, they play, Automatic, The world behind my wall and Ready, set, go!

Bill is totally gorgeous... have to admit! And Fery scream like crazy for 15 minutes!

Well, it was a great experience, again together.

Also we were part of the biggest dance in Guiness, the last record was of The Black Eyed Peas but the hosts and us, with 120,000 other people, dance a foolish song. It was really funny!

So later I´ll try to submit some TH pictures... seriously, are bad pictures, but with a lot of love.

Well, thankyou for read this huge journal...and be part of my life!


I think I seriuously need some rest!

XOX


Ady